1. Building Safer, More Inclusive Spaces in Writing Groups
Hi. My talk is about building safer, more inclusive spaces in writing groups!
2. Outline
Here’s the outline of what I’ll cover today. I’ll begin with a brief intro, then give you a big picture of the framework I’m using to talk about these ideas. Then I’ll dive into some actionable ways to put these ideas into practice when you’re setting up a group, maintaining the group, and finally we’ll talk about problems!
3. Intro
Hi. I’m Jane Pinckard. Four years ago, when I decided to start writing fiction “seriously,” I started looking for a writing group. I joined a ton of different groups in my area, which is Los Angeles. It took me a full year of active searching and I lucked into finding one that I’ve now been with for three years.
I’m also planning a week-long novel writing workshop for twelve writers and my co-leaders and I have done a lot of research into inclusivity and safer spaces.
Finally, four years ago I also started teaching in the division of Interactive Media and Games at the School of Cinematic Arts at USC. And it turns out a lot of the techniques I learned to use in the classroom are easily adaptable to a writing group!
4. A healthy group is like a healthy eco-system. The good news is that healthy habits, once formed, are pretty easy to maintain. Once you’ve set the culture of your writing group, it’s like having a robust immune system — it can fight off threats with minimal intervention.
5. What is Safer?
I want to start by tacking the term “safe space” or “safer space” because the phrase is used to mean two very different things in different contexts which I think has led to a lot of confusion.
6. On the one hand, there’s an idea of emotional safety, such as when women join an all-women’s group, or people of color join a POC group, or queer folks might join a queer group. Groups like this are about giving people who share marginalized identities a place to come together and give support and express themselves freely.
The other version of “safe space” means a space of freedom to explore and express difficult, uncomfortable ideas and to have conversations in an environment of respect. This meaning often has more of an intellectual and academic cast to it.
Both of these spaces are important and both are relevant to writing groups. But they’re in tension with each other. So the first thing I think you need to do is understand the difference and understand how your writing group is going to navigate that distance.
7. But one key to keep in mind is that there’s no such thing as a “safe space,” especially not if you inhabit any form of marginalized identity or body. This is partly because the world is not safe for many people, and because writing is inherently risky. It’s risky and dangerous to explore territory outside of your comfort zone, and to invite others along to explore with you, and to open your mind up to new, challenging perspectives.
That’s why I prefer the term “safer space” because to me, that suggests that while it’s never 100% safe, we come to the group recognizing and respecting the risk in what we’re doing as writers, and we commit to helping each other.
That is not to say anything goes. Each writing group can and should have their own guidelines for what the members feel comfortable with.
8. Inclusivity When I talk about inclusivity, what I mean is an active act of welcoming and respecting. I like this definition:
9. “A sense of belonging; feeling respected, valued for who you are; feeling a level of supportive energy and commitment from others so you can do your best work.”
I like this because it’s much more active than just allowing someone to join, maybe sit in the corner, listen in; no, inclusive to me is about welcoming people to participate, it’s about actively showing them that we value their perspective.
The other side of the coin is that “Inclusive” does not mean everyone is welcome. There are people who don’t respect everyone, don’t value everyone on the group. Those people are not welcome in an inclusive group. In order for a group to remain inclusive, each member has to commit to actively upholding it as a value.
Specifically to a writing group, inclusivity means remembering that everyone comes from a different writing background both in terms of craft and goals. A good writing group will help writers work on their weaknesses while bolstering their strengths.
10. Setting up your Group
11. Consider drafting a statement of values that express what you and your group want in terms of shared goals, expectations, and so on. This statement can be whatever you want, however long you need it to be (although if you expect people to read it, you should consider editing it!)
12. If your group is meeting for an extended retreat or workshop that spans a few days or more, I strongly urge you to write up a Code of Conduct, and include in there what the protocol is for filing complaints, what sorts of actions will be taken, and how the admins of the group will be held accountable.
Use your best judgement about how necessary this is. If you’ve been in the same group with the same four or five folks for several years and you all decide to go on a retreat, it probably won’t be necessary to draft it up. But if you’re inviting people you don’t know very well, or if there are going to be a lot of people, then I suggest you do this.
The function of a code of conduct is threefold. First, it lets people know unambiguously what behaviors are not tolerated; second, by doing so, it reassures your members that you take their safety and comfort seriously. And finally, it gives you and your admins a blueprint to follow if there has been a complaint. Half the time I think complaints are not addressed because there is confusion and panic among the organizers in places that don’t have a clear code of conduct.
13. When deciding where to meet, if you decide to meet in person, consider elements like accessibility of your location. Is it close to public transportation? Is there adequate parking? Does it require stairs? Are there allergens?
If you meet in a public space, is it loud and busy? Many writers, especially those with ADHD or ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder), find these spaces distracting or overstimulating and may experience anxiety as a result.
14. In the first meeting, I suggest that members introduce their pronouns as well as themselves. The more normalized this practice becomes, the less anxiety gender-queer or trans people will feel about joining writing groups. I do it on the first day of every class I teach and it’s such an easy habit to build.
I also suggest you have the group members express what they’re looking for from the group and what their goals are. That’s going to help everyone tailor their critiques to what the writer needs. It’s also going to help new writers feel more comfortable sharing their work if they know that the other members have a heads up about what kind of writer they are.
15. I’m a bit agnostic on content warnings. I prefer the term “content note” actually, because “trigger warnings” actually has the effect of putting me on high alert. That’s just me, but whenever anyone says “warning” I get nervous. “Content note” is more neutral.
In my current group, our members have volunteered content notes when there are instances of gore or sexual violence, but it hasn’t been a formal policy. In other group I’m working with, we’re putting together a slightly more formal guideline for including content notes. It’s really up to you and your group how you want to handle that, but in general I think content notes can be really helpful.
One thing I’d like to emphasize about content notes: the intent of these isn’t so that group members can decline to read something. Their intended use is to help people confront challenging material. And in my opinion, if you’re in a writing group, you have a professional responsibility to do your best to read the material other group members have submitted to you if you’ve agreed to, and do your best to help them craft that material, for as long as you remain in the group. That said, if one member is consistently submitting really awful, troubling work, then you can decide whether you want that kind of work in your group, or not.
16. You can implement all of these ideas in a group that’s already been active, although I will say that if there are some problems already, it will be a tough challenge. The hardest thing to do is change the culture of a community once it’s been set. If that’s the case for you, then I’d suggest taking a hard look at where the group is at now and where you want it to be, and decide how fixable the problems are. And maybe you need to start a new group.
17. Maintaining your Group
18. Make sure you build in some social time to let the group members get to know each other a little. While the writing group is a professional endeavor and should be treated like one, you can build empathy during social interactions. People are more likely to relax around each other, feel welcomed, and treat each other with compassion if they know each other.
That said, during the social time, be aware of a couple of things. If you’re serving food or beverages, make sure you know what people’s dietary restrictions are. You can circulate an email beforehand. In our group we have a member who has Celiac disease and another who is violently allergic to bananas, and whenever we have a new member join we send a friendly email reminder.
The other thing is, and I know it’s hard, but don’t assume everyone in the group drinks alcohol. This shouldn’t stop you from serving alcohol, of course! It certainly doesn’t stop me. But just be aware that there are many people who don’t or can’t drink, and have something else for them so they don’t feel left out. If you bring alcohol to a meet-up, frame it as a gift for those who’ll partake rather than a gift for the entire group.
Another thing to keep in mind is to be circumspect with using humor that relies heavily on cultural codes, pop culture, or sarcasm. Our group is pretty international and we grew up around the world, so not everyone gets references to American pop culture, especially from more than fifteen years ago.
The sarcasm thing is partly because it’s highly cultural, but also because many folks with ASD don’t really do sarcasm. There’s someone in my group who often asks “Are you serious or being sarcastic?” It must get tiring to ask that all the time.
Again, your group will have its own nuance and members and I’m not at all saying you can never use culturally-coded humor or sarcasm; I’m just giving you some tools to help you be more aware of the impact certain kinds of humor might have on people, and hopefully raise your sensitivity around it.
19. Good critique habits are a key part of keeping the community inclusive. Notice who talks and who doesn’t, and make sure to invite or make room for those who don’t. Don’t be afraid to gently interrupt a persistent talker to say something like “I think Alanna had something to say. What was that, Alanna?” If several people consistently dominate the sessions, consider using a timer.
Don’t be afraid to be the time cop. Practice the art of saying with a smile, “I think that’s time. We need to move on!”
Similarly, if a discussion starts getting heated in the group, it’s perfectly okay to step in and say, “I’m sure there’s a lot more to say about this, but we need to move on!” The group will be healthier for it.
20. I’m not going to cover critique etiquette basics, because that’s not what the talk is about; but I will say that when you address something problematic in someone’s writing, framing is super important. I’ll give you an example. One of our group members had a scene of his 500-year-old immortal hero in his lair, coding his secret passageways by using Mandarin, which, according to the hero, is a super difficult and challenging language that no one would ever crack.
I could have pointed out that this is Orientalizing and Euro-centric and all that, but instead I just commented that Mandarin is in fact the most spoken language in the world, and is not at all as obscure as his hero believed, and perhaps the hero could have picked up an obscure dead language in his 500 years on earth, something that could also provide a bit of intriguing backstory. Way better way to frame my critique, right?
21. Finally, check in regularly and privately with group members to make sure the aspects of the group dynamics are working for them. Ask for specific suggestions they might want to see changed.
22. Handling Problems
23. “We don’t need to establish a code of conduct because we’re all adults here.”
This statement comes, I believe, from fear of change: that if there’s a code of conduct, the sorts of the interactions the group used to have may be changed. The way to address this is to reassure everyone that you value the interactions you have and you want to be able to grow and evolve the writing group, ensuring that the interactions remain positive and healthy. Being an adult doesn’t, unfortunately, prevent people from behaving in ways that can harm the group dynamic, and with a code of conduct, you’re able to keep everyone on the same page.
24. “We all know each other, so naturally we’ll be respectful and kind.”
Like the statement above, I think this stems primarily from fear of change. Once again, reassure the objector that you value the respect the group already displays. When you invite new people into the group, you not only want to make sure they understand the expected behaviors and attitudes, but you’re also reassuring them of the group’s values. A code of conduct makes it easier for new members to get up to speed and contribute meaningfully to the group’s activities.
25. “I don’t want to have to walk on eggshells around sensitive people.”
This sentiment is about one of two things: one is fear of saying something offensive by accident.
I’ve had good success by reminding everyone that we’re all learning, and to be gentle with each other. We are going to make mistakes because we’re human, and that’s how we learn. So this goes both ways. On the one hand, we agree to give each other the benefit of the doubt, to bring up problematic issues in their writing kindly, but the other piece of it is that the writer needs to listen, be sincere in their efforts to understand and get better, and do their own homework to meet other group members half way. This goes for not only issues of, say, representations of marginalized cultures or people but also craft issues. It gets very tiring when a writer makes the same craft mistakes — such as run-on sentences or incorrect dialog tags — over and over without a perceptible effort at making improvements.
This only works if the person in question is willing to learn and has intentions of growing with the group. If you sense there’s more resistance, it might just make time as the person slowly adjusts, or you might have to consider letting that person go, which I’ll talk about in a bit.
The second version of this fear is from someone who has enjoyed making off-color jokes and now feels stifled. This is a tricky one, because they perceive these changes as attacking their identities and mode of self-expression. You can ask them if, in the interests of the group, they would feel okay with muting some of their more off-color comments. If they’re committed to the group as a whole, they will likely agree, and over time I think you’ll see that the stronger the culture is, the more they’ll naturally fit themselves into it. If they don’t, then what they’re really saying is that they don’t have the interests of the group at heart and it’s probably best for them to find a new group.
26. “I don’t want to feel censored.”
This is an important one for writers, obviously! To me, this is usually about the writing itself. People may feel that considerations for safer spaces and inclusion mean they can’t write about controversial or challenging subjects. Reassure them that that is not the case; in fact, the opposite! These guidelines and ideals are meant to empower writers to go to those risky places and explore, and learn, with the group’s help, how to take those risks with deeply nuanced understanding.
27. Letting Someone Go
Finally, if there’s someone in the group who is a problem that isn’t getting better, you have to be ready to let them go. This is always really hard to do and frankly, it feels bad. You might ask yourself, isn’t the point of being inclusive to include everyone?
But here’s the thing. You don’t include a wolf in a sheep farm. There are some people who can disrupt a group’s culture so massively that it will never recover, and those people need to be removed before they can do that.
If your group has created and established a pretty strong culture, the disruptive person might leave on their own. This is what’s happened in our group a few times. They sense they’re not a good fit, or they’re not going to find allies, or maybe they just find us boring, I don’t know! But the ones we sensed might be trouble left.
However, one stayed. And this one was hard, because they were not actively disruptive or disrespectful. It took us several months to understand what they were doing to the group dynamic, because it was subtle. This person was extremely, exhaustingly needy. The group admins spent several emails dealings with them, and they would regularly email other members outside of the critique group to ask for critiques outside of the scheduled sessions. During sessions, they were extremely emotionally volatile, reacting poorly to critiques and being defensive.
In retrospect, it boggles my mind why we waited so long to ask them to leave. I think when you’re trying to be empathetic, it can sometimes blind you to behaviors that are actually deeply disrespectful of the group’s time and energy. We really wanted to help this person, and so we kept going for months with no result. In the meantime, other members stopped coming, and the admins started to dread seeing the person’s email in their inboxes. Their presence had a chilling effect on the group. That’s the kind of person you need to let go.
THANK YOU!